Put those slippers on your feet, light a fire in the fireplace, grab a cozy blanket and get set because it’s that time of the year, and there is no point in trying to flee from the impending saccharine brainwashing that lies ahead.  You know what I mean, the mind engulfing, overly sentimental, sugary sweet carnage that you can’t possibly look away from…Countdown to Christmas on the Hallmark Channel!  This year, the festive fun began on October 28^th (yes, even before Halloween) and I’ve been wrapped up ever since.  Dang you Hallmark.

I want to be angry that I’ll be not only tempted, but resigned to either watch or DVR countless hours of sappy, I know what’s going to happen by the end of the movie in the first ten minutes (and that’s being conservative), holiday programming.  But, I’m not.  I’m giddy and wide-eyed for every single film.  It’s a compulsion really.  In fact, it’s the only time of year I easily fall asleep to something on the television that isn’t a forensics show.  If the television is on from now until December 31^st, it should be on the Hallmark Channel, or at the very least, quickly accessible via the “last” button on the remote.

Whether it’s Alicia Witt, Lori Loughlin or Lacey Chabert, I get sucked in to each and every glorious tale.  And, in the rare instance that you tire of one particular film or tune in at an odd time, Hallmark ingeniously has TWO stations to accommodate you, with alternating start times, of course; so, there is no escape.  As our good friend Candace Cameron-Bure excellently conveyed, if you love Jolly Romantic Comedies you’ll enjoy the Hallmark Channel, but if you’re in the mood for Timeless Favorites, tune into Hallmark Movies & Mysteries.  It’s a wonder I can keep up with all the options because I happen to love both!

And, it’s why, when I realize it isn’t even Thanksgiving, but I’ve already watched 15 of these holiday gems (only 3 without the word Christmas in the title, points out my friend Tim) that I come to the realization that I am forlornly, nothing short of obsessed.  However, as I find myself in the middle of countless debates and comparison conversations over the acting skills exhibited in such enduring new classics as “The Christmas Train” versus “Christmas Getaway;” I also realize that I am not the only one enraptured and possessed by this annual holiday debauchery.

At least I’m not alone.

Perhaps I should start a support group for those of us that simply can’t get enough sugary festive fare.  My fear is that we’d turn our crisis group into a viewing party, complete with spiked eggnog to be sipped each time one of the actor’s says the word “Christmas.”  (Hey, that’s not a bad idea)  Seriously though, we certainly can break away from the insanity if we really want to, right?  After all, how have we been surviving between January and October?  Answer: Hallmark Channel’s Christmas Keepsake Week held each July.  Hallmark does know how to cater to their fans, I’ll give you that.  Their website features holiday how-tos, recipes, photo filters and even shopping!  Oh Hallmark, you clever, clever network.  Heck, this year they even started a game on their website where you pick your fantasy weekly draft “team” of movies for the weekend ahead based on how many viewers you think they will actually accrue.

Here’s one for you Hallmark, how about letting the audience choose a future holiday film?  List your usual roster of rotating actors and actresses, along with a list of plot premises and twists and let a viewer poll decide what will come next.  I envision something like this…

CHOOSE ONE FROM EACH COLUMN:

Then, whatever matchups receive the most votes…ta-da!  I guarantee it will be next year’s most viewed holiday movie!

Maybe one voter actually gets the chance to be in the film or the cast can come to their town for a premiere party?   Although, to be fair, we Hallmark movie junkies don’t need any prizes for voting.  Each new film is a prize in itself and each one has its own special place in our hearts.  Yes, they are cheesy; yes, they are unrealistic; yes, they are predictable; and, yes, they are also magical!

Unfortunately, this year’s holiday schedule will be over before we know it; and, we’ll have to bid adieu to the Christmas decorations, cookie making and holiday customs.  Alas, thank goodness we aren’t far from “Countdown to Valentine’s Day,” so at least we have something to look forward to, for now.  #50WeeksTo50